On my 53rd birthday

We can say your name now without tears. Now searchingly, I can grasp to relearn who you were as my mind has stood still from thoughts of you while my heart, torn open by your young death, still struggles to produce a beating heart, without missing a beat. To carry on. I can smile.

As I have sought to change nearly every aspect of my life in order to still exist without you, I cannot hide from my love for you. You are missed Sam. Beyond measure. Beyond my love. Beyond my grasp. #muchlovetosam